Transcript - Episode 019 - Yeah-Yeah-Yeah, Mouth Breathers & Fake Accents

Episode 019
Yeah-Yeah-Yeah, Mouth Breathers & Fake Accents

You can listen to the episode HERE.

Candidates get nervous. When they get nervous, crazy things happen. They fidget, they bring forth really weird speaking habits, they even change their natural speaking accent. 

Hi, I'm Daava Mills, The Rebellious Recruiter. Have you ever thought about helping a candidate succeed in an interview? I do. I don't want people losing a chance at a job over their nerves. Even sitting in the corporate seat, there is still a great benefit to helping people succeed. Nerves happen, but they shouldn't be a barrier to having a great person on your team. So, what do you do when you see or hear a candidate get overtaken by nerves?

Take a seat, and let's chat!

Intro Music

A couple weeks ago we published the conversation I had with Heather Hill, in that the conversation she spoke a bit about helping candidates get ready for an interview, and what makes them nervous. 

Well, a lot makes people nervous. If you meet me in real life, I'm boisterous, full of ideas, and rarely afraid of people. Ask complete strangers for favors? Bring it on, it's amazing what people will do for you if you just ask. Most don't say "no." But that's me. I'm on the extreme end of the social spectrum. Most people are closer to what makes the average. But there are still people on the other extreme or have personality quirks that show up in weird ways.

Take for instance a speaking habit I have, it's so over the top, it comes out in my writing. I often have to edit my writing to get rid of this habit… but it still shows up. What is the habit? Me starting my sentences with "So…" I know it's there; I try to reel it in, it still happens. And I am sure more than one person notices during training calls, or what not. 

Speaking habits are the worst. I had one candidate that each time I asked a question, started the answer with "yeah, yeah, yeah." Then he'd give me the answer. The issue is that the trifecta of "yeahs" was so distracting that I couldn't focus on what he was telling me. And you know what? No one ever told him he had this habit, and I knew it was keeping him from a job. What did I do? 

"Hey there Mr. Candidate, I'm gonna stop you for a minute. This is real feedback. I want you to be aware of something you are doing in your interview that is really distracting. Now, I'm going to tell you, and you are going to be embarrassed about it. Don't be. You start each answer with 'yeah, yeah, yeah.' What's about to happen is I'm going to ask you another question, you are going to start with the 'yeahs,' catch yourself, and get frustrated. It's okay. This is important because it's distracting to me, and if it's distracting to me, it's certainly going to be distracting to the next interviewer. Go easy on yourself and notice it. I don't expect perfection, but I want to help you present the best way you know how."

Sure enough, the next question, the "yea…" leaked out, deep breath, collected thoughts, and he answered. It happened several more times. But he was working on it. We never hired him, but I know he got rid of that speaking habit, and it probably helped him immensely. 

You know what was funny about that conversation? The people in the office. I shared a space with three other people. As I was coaching the candidate, the room got deadly quiet. When I completed the interview, someone piped up with "I can't believe you had that conversation with him." Apparently, it's revolutionary to help people, but I'm trying to build businesses. I'm not going to let bad speaking habits prevent excellent candidates from getting a chance.

A couple days later, I had another situation with a candidate. I was interviewing a person who was to work with engineers. I've worked with enough stamped professionals to know that specifics in communicating is required. I asked one of my favorite questions, "What was the last system you learned, and how many days, weeks or months did it take for you to become proficient in it?" Now this question isn't about the days, weeks or months. It's about digging into how the candidate learns, how they use systems, how they look at modules, and what they consider proficiency to be. Because I've met accountants that think being proficient in Excel means good formatting, they don't know what a formula is. Seriously, they don't. 

Back to the candidate that would be working with engineers. I asked my question, his response? "It was quick." 

I replied that I understand he feels it was quick, but it's a relative term. What is quick? Is it 30 days? 15 days perhaps? Mind you, I hadn't even gotten to the proficient discussion. 

He responded with "it was really fast."

So, my direct personality came right out. I explained to him that due to the position working with engineers, his ability to speak in direct numbers and absolutes was required. And I reframed the question, "Okay, so please tell me in a specific number, how many days or weeks did it take you to become proficient in this program?" 

He replied, "not long at all."

To which I replied, "thank you for your time. I need someone who can listen to what I am asking and respond in kind. Being able to speak in absolutes is very important to this team. We won't be moving forward with you." 

Yep. I was direct. You know what? The hiring manager thanked me when I told her about that. She didn't want to work with someone who wasn't trainable. To be clear, this was a 6-figure position, I probably would have had more leniency on a person making less money. But at that level, people need to be able to take advice and be directed as needed. 

You see, I've talked about it in another podcast. But being available to coach potential staff, and then watching them to see if they can absorb and implement said coaching? That's a winning recipe. 

Oooh, here's a bad habit. Mouth breathers! It's caused by excitement. Generally, happens over the phone. At least, that's where it's most noticeable. 

The issue is that once a person starts mouth breathing, their system actually turns from excitement to panic. It's a built-in biological thing. The lizard brain probably thinks they're running from a cave lion or something. 

When that happens, I do a couple things. First, people are now fighting panic, which causes a vicious circle. So, I step in. "Hey there, you sound like you're a bit excited, and it's causing you to be nervous." I've only once been wrong when asking this. Everyone else stated that they were indeed nervous. I tell them I can tell because their mouth breathing is picking up, and they are likely fighting their nerves, and not giving me their best answers. 

So, I tell them, "let's take a moment. Breathe deeply. In the nose, out the mouth. When you get panicky again, slightly constrict your throat, and listen for the white noise in your head." One can really only pull this off inhaling through the nose, so it works to stop the mouth breathing, and the candidate calms down. Once I can hear they are sufficiently calm, I change the subject back to the interview. 

Here's the strangest one that's ever happened. I was interviewing someone; they had told me over the phone they had moved here from South Africa. Now I've interviewed people from all over the world, and accents come and go. She didn't have an accent, so I didn't think too much of it. I brought her in for a face-to-face interview, and halfway through the interview this Dutch South African accent came out. It was surprising, and somewhat bemusing. We asked her about it. She said when she felt comfortable, she stopped hiding behind and American accent. Truly one of the more unique interviews I've been in.

So why do I share this with you? Because your company, the opening you have? It's someone's jam! And giving them advice, even if you don't hire them? It might come back around. It's part of the relationship building aspect, it's the coaching and the mentoring. If you put yourself in that driver seat, it will be more natural when you bring people on. You'll also be more likely to bring people on who collaborate with you, challenge you, follow through. 

You’re putting good things out in the world. Maybe your advice will help them build somewhere else. Thinking a bit globally, it's good for you, good for the candidates, good for the industry, community, the world. And your soul. It's good for your soul.

As always, I’ll be bringing you new information weekly. Be sure to subscribe wherever you are listening to this. Feel free to comment, rate, and review what you hear. Share this podcast with other leaders that may be building “out of this world teams.” You can email me with your thoughts or questions. I may use your subject matter in upcoming shows. 

It’s great to meet you and thank you for listening. I know you only have so many hours in the week, and I am grateful to spend this time with you. Until then, make it a great day! See you on the flip side.